So Proud Of This Lady
This is a must read book for managing stress when your normal is changed due to bereavement, illness, redundancy or in Cath’s case when her Dad became Joan.
Cath’s family did get through this and Joan and her mum are still together as a couple.
There are so many valuable lessons to be shared based on how this family held it together through this major change. And like any change it didn’t come without consequences and heart ache. Cath has modelled out what they did to live with their new normal and spends much of her time working with clients to develop strategies to manage stress effectively.
Heart Breaking News
Cath is in the middle of the last phase of editing her book and I am so proud of her commitment despite devastating news a few weeks ago. For those established authors you will know how hard the editing phase can be. When you finish your final draft you think that you are there, then you get the first iteration, and the second iteration and then even more iterations of editing before the book is actually ready for publishing. It can be a difficult time without any external factors.
So I am sure you can understand why I am so proud of Cath who received the call that every parent dreads, a call that advised her that her son had been involved in a serious mountain biking accident where he broke his neck.
Cath’s son is now paralysed and in hospital in Scotland many miles away from her famiy home – so she is not only juggling the final edits but also hospital visits, travelling, her business, her family, her home, Let’s Talk Live 8pm Wednesday and her own emotional needs all at the same time.
She is awesome.
Cath has stayed focused on living with her new normal and this week she was talking about the signs of stress and the importance of consistency.
I felt compelled to write this article to honour this wonderful lady and sent it for approval and asked Cath “How can we (Karen and I) best support you?”
She said “This sort of support means the world to me”
When I asked Cath what would she like me to ask my readers she said:
“I would love to know:
- What are you finding difficult to manage?
- How do you want to be feeling instead?
- What are you struggling to let go of?
- What are you looking for?
- Are you struggling to understand why are you feeling the way they are?
- Are you managing the conflict in your head or is it between your head and your heart.”
[Manage Your Critic]
What kind of support and resource?
One of the questions I ask clients to consider when learning to manage their critic is: “What kind of support or resource might you need?”
It is always fascinating when our critic is stressed and wishing someone could help us that when asked what kind of help would we like – we invariably can’t articulate it.
This often results in others guessing what we need and invariably getting it wrong.
So I am really pleased and not surprised that Cath can say what she needs and I would like to ask you to support me by engaging with this blog and sharing with your friends.
Don’t guess ask
It got me thinking how often when we want to support someone else in pain we ‘try’ to make things easier for them, we try to make them rest and want to do things for them. When for some maintaining some kind of normality is important.
When my mum was dying going to work was so important. I didn’t tell anyone at work what was happening and that way it created a sacred space where I could be normal. Yes I was in denial for those few hours a day but I needed that. I needed to stay focused in order to show up and create a safe space for my children as a single mum.
That is why it is so important to have clarity of what works for you and to be okay with others thinking differently. It is also important to be able to say no and to know what kind of help you want and need and then have the clarity and confidence to ask for help.
With this in mind can you help me to support Cath by sharing below the answers to her questions and or join her Facebook group – Living With Normal and encourage her as she learns to live with her new normal.
Share posts and help her promote her up and coming book and let her know we have got her back.
And if you are struggling with asking for help then please do join my group Manage Your Critic -A community committed to non- judgmental listening where we explore all kinds of things that prevent us from having clarity of what we want and the confidence to ask for it.
About the Author – Sheryl Andrews – The Strength and Solution Detective
Sheryl Andrews, Founder of Step by Step Listening, is well known for speaking fast speaking and her passion to make things happen. But what many of you may not know is that in private behind closed doors she was also no stranger to lapses in self belief and an overwhelming sense of not being good enough.
That was until she learned how to manage her critic and turned her overwhelm into clarity and confidence in 7 steps.
Sheryl now runs retreats that encourage you to really listen to what you need to work, learn and live at your best with others and the confidence to ask for those needs to be met.
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