How Do You Reward Yourself?

valarie woodmoreThis week I was chatting to Valerie Woodmore, a client, friend and fellow Think Big member about health and as we got chatting I was reminded that I got into my work 10 years ago because I was curious about what else I could do to support my clients.

At the time I was a Slimming World consultant and I was being asked questions outside the parameters of the support I had been trained in.

Members were struggling to know how to get the buy in and support of those at home. Ironically it took me training as a coach and then another 4 years working with clients to help them gain clarity of what they wanted and the confidence to ask for it –  to completely unravel what was holding both my clients and myself back from truly engaging with long term life changes.

 

Incentives

What I discovered is that not only do people fail to ask the right people for advise they also often lack motivation and incentive to achieve with this I have become  increasingly interested in how we reward ourselves for our achievements.

In this month’s power group we explored how we would celebrate our success and it was interesting to hear that some were going to give themselves some time off and others a glass of red wine.

Personally I have been working to changing my behaviour around using food as a reward.

I am even changing how I talk about it and I have been known to say things like I am rewarding myself with crunchy and colourful food.

So it was interesting to read this article from Valerie How to be healthy? 

I particulary like that is never too late to improve your health.

There are some great tips to get you started and I would love it if you left Valerie a comment if you find the article inspirational.

Listen to your body it knows best

On another note whilst seeking advice from experts is important – it is equally important that you check in with your intuition and listen to yourself. I believe that when you really take time to listen it doesn’t take much to notice what works for your body and mind.

I do understand that weight loss etc take time and yet I also know that the minute you do something different you can instantly feel better.

For example a client this week said she was feeling lethargic and wished she could physically shake it off. I invited her to stand up and shake it off and guess what just by standing up and physically shaking it off she felt better.

I do strongly encourage you to read this article and then consider one thing you could do this week that would make you feel healthier. That is assuming you want to feel healthier of course.

Personally I have diarised this article for once a month and will look to see how many I can improve over the next 6 months. It has inspired me to give myself a score out of 10 for each of them based on 10 being that I am achieving my optimum in this area.

1 = 10/10 which is interesting because it was only a 6 before I had to write it down for you in this blog but now I am realising this is important I want do more of the healthy things I love and ditch the critic in my head and outside that challenges me on my choices.

2 = 6/10 I need to talk to Valerie again to understand exactly what is considered processed food and then decide one that I am willing to stop buying for a month. Not sure I want to give up my baked beans yet.

3 = 5/10 I am pretty good for my meals but I need to do some serious work with my snacks so  I am committing to replacing unhealthy snacks for fruit and veg

4 = 9/10 already pretty good at this I just need to buy a healthy choice for me when the boys have pizza on Friday’s as I don’t even enjoy pizza I just join in to feel part of the party.

5 = 7/10 I usually shop with a list and I can be pretty committed and what I have noticed is that when I shop at Aldi’s or Lidl’s I buy less ‘treats’ and I save money so I am going to commit to shopping there for the next month

6 =  8/10 I am pretty committed to my 2 fitness classes per week and a walk at the weekend with Mark but to get to a 10 I would need to walk for 30 minutes every day. This is not as important to me this month and I will focus on maintaining the 3 sessions

7 = 8/10 pretty happy with my sleep patterns and know they improve when I eat crunchy and colourful food

8 = 4/10 I am not very good at rewarding myself for anything and this is a work in progress. Over the years I have changed my focus from unhealthy food as a reward to seeing healthy food is my reward.  But I do need something else – a reward system that is affordable and sustainable. As I write it comes to me that my health is the greatest reward I can give myself and longetivity of life.

Can you please help me by leaving a comment below and share how do you celebrate your wins in life?

What reward stategies do you have?

Do you have any strategies that don’t involve food or drink?

I would love some ideas.

Thanks in advance

Sheryl

x

About the Author – Sheryl Andrews – The Strength and Solution Detective

how to improve listening skills

Sheryl Andrews, Founder of Step by Step Listening, is well known for her fast speaking and her passion to make things happen. But what many of you may not know is that in private behind closed doors she was also no stranger to lapses in self belief and an overwhelming sense of not being good enough.

That was until she conquered her sensitivity to criticism and her fear of not being liked.

Today, Sheryl runs safe to speak retreats where you can develop resources and skills to gain clarity and confidence of what you want and how you want to be and all the time you will be improving and changing the way you respond to feedback.

Fancy a virtual coffee and chat, then please feel free to book a complimentary clarity and confidence session. or SAS Detective TV

Don’t know how call her now….+44(0)1329 286648

Free Step By Step Listening Guide

Free Motivational Newsletter

Follow Step By Step Listening on Social Media

Twitter

Linked in

Facebook Business

Facebook Personal

Facebook – How to improve listening skills? Daily activities to get you thinking.

SAS Detective TV You Tube

Please do send me a personal message as I don’t say yes to everyone that sends me a connection or friend request.

 

 

 

 

Love is….getting curious together

This week’s post is inspired by the many different conversations I heard over Valentines day and because What’s working Wednesday is also mine and Mark’s date night.

Did you have the perfect Valentine day for you?

Or did you spend most of it feeling resentful and less than loved?

If love or just romance is evading you then I invite you to ask more questions.

Curiosity is the first step to gaining clarity of what you want and fully understanding what you want is the only way I know how to get it.

If you don’t have clarity of what you want how can you make it happen?

Then once you have clarity of the definition of love for you, I invite you to ask a couple of friends and family for their definition and get curious about how differently we all think of and experience love and romance.

Please check out this video where I share how differenlty Mark and I think about what makes us ‘feel special’

Please do share below your findings.

Sheryl x

 
About the Author – Sheryl Andrews – The Strength and Solution Detective

how to improve listening skills

Sheryl Andrews, Founder of Step by Step Listening, is well known for her fast speaking and her passion to make things happen. But what many of you may not know is that in private behind closed doors she was also no stranger to lapses in self belief and an overwhelming sense of not being good enough.

That was until she conquered her sensitivity to criticism and her fear of not being liked.

Today, Sheryl runs safe to speak retreats where you can develop resources and skills to gain clarity and confidence of what you want and how you want to be and all the time you will be improving and changing the way you respond to feedback.

Fancy a virtual coffee and chat, then please feel free to book a complimentary clarity and confidence session. or SAS Detective TV

Don’t know how call her now….+44(0)1329 286648

Free Step By Step Listening Guide

Free Motivational Newsletter

Follow Step By Step Listening on Social Media

Twitter

Linked in

Facebook Business

Facebook Personal

Facebook – How to improve listening skills? Daily activities to get you thinking.

SAS Detective TV You Tube

Please do send me a personal message as I don’t say yes to everyone that sends me a connection or friend request.

 

17th February 2016 Uncategorised
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Are You Struggling To Please Everyone In Your Life?

how to make good decisions When it comes to making decisions it is all too easy to fall into the trap of making decisions that work for everyone else but don’t include your own well being.
This week I found myself doing just that and it showed up in the same way it always does – Overwhelm and frustration.
What was nice to notice is that this time I was not on the floor in tears screaming and shouting at my family for letting me down and not supporting me. I know and I am embarrassed to admit that is what use to happen before I learned how to listen to and manage my critic.
It started off with a mild irriation and ended up where my head felt smothered and that my insides were playing tug of war with each other.
My language was such that I was constantly saying I don’t have time.
And even when I had time I found myself going round in circles being ineffective.
The great thing about clarity is once you have it then you can take action and life feels so much easier.
T- Trust Yourself
So last night I sat down with my own thoughts, trusted my own process and took my own advice.
I started with the question:
What would I like to have happen?
The response was I don’t want to go to networking and I wish I had not agreed to write an article for the magazine when I know the deadlines is too tight for me. I want to be there for my friend that is moving, I want date night, I want to have time to give my son a lift to work, I want to eat properly and have time to get fit and I want time to check in with my best friend who is not well and I want to check in with my sister and…this list was quite long but you get the idea.
The net result is that I had to cancel some commitments and say no to someone.
Just doing that would free my diary up and more importantly free my head up to feel able to do my best work.
Then the critic kicks in with rules about it is rude to cancel and you should not let people down.
So I checked in and gave myself time to really reflect asking the lovely Bryon Katie question:
Is that true? If I cancel am I being rude and letting people down.
Well the truth is that yes I might be. And they may not like it. Then I have to go back to clarity and check in what kind of people? and what kind of let down? What kind of rude?
I realised that whilst I thought it was rude to let other people down it was apparently perfectly acceptable to let myself down,which of course is not okay.
If I let myself down then I can’t do my best work and I can’t be there for those that need me.
So by the end of the day I had cancelled a networking event and my commitment to do the editorial.
Now I feel calm again.
I have spoken to those involved and guess what nothing horrible happened.
Now I do know that sometimes people do get upset and say things that can trigger guilt but I know how to manage my own internal triggers should that happen.
What is happening for you?
Do you have space to think?
I almost lost sight of the good stuff when I was consumed by the overwhelm. I started to think I am crap at writing and I don’t know why I am bothering.
When your critic starts putting you down that is a good sign that you are not listening to yourself.
Take time to consider are you making decisions that are inclusive of you and your well being AND those you serve.
If you feel like there is never enough hours in the day for everyone then you might find this weeks video useful
This weeks what’s working video:

Lots of Love
?Sheryl x
The Strength And Solution Detective
Supporting you to do more of what you love and ditch the critic that says you can’t
Know that making good decisions that include your needs is a life long pattern that you want to change please do book a call and let’s chat and find out if Do, Delegate or Ditch is your next best step